More than a month later I know recognize how foolish my initial panic was when it came to what happened with Ace, though perhaps not entirely preventable. It reminds me of years ago when I was much younger and how I’d over-dramatically panic in reaction to something upsetting. While there is a small amout of regret for the actions I took, it’s ultimately not the end of the world. I think sometimes we need to remind ourselves that even when something truamatic happens and it feels as though everything comes to a crashing halt, the world around you is still going on just as it always has, and will.
Time
It’s taken time for my mind to fully comprehend all of what happened with Ace, but I’m glad to say for the most part it no longer haunts me. Rather my memories of hanging out with Ace are warm ones, sans my crippling panic attack.
Reflection
When I wrote my last blog post I was in the mindset that writing more blog posts would help, yet what really helped was a bit of a nostolgia trip. Sometime after my last blog post I become more and more concerned with my personal identity and who I was, an issue that’s haunted me all of my life. The way I went about this was just going through archives of what had to be hundreds of emails I had with old freinds and acquaintances, seeing how I’ve grown as a person over the years. It’s actually amazing how much I’ve changed as a person! Though that is a post for another time.
Summary
In conclusion, I’ve learned a lot about not only myself over the past few months, but I’ve learned how to handle certain situations that may happen again. I’m glad I spent the time with Ace that I did.